1. Concrete and cement are, like, not the same thing. Remember that time that Christopher Columbus rolled over to the states in his big boat and labelled all the people he saw “Indians”? Then to find out that he wasn’t in India after all. I can hear Chris now, “It was a hilarious misunderstanding.” Not that hilarious–just embarrassing. Cement is a powder that when mixed with water and other materials creates concrete. Cement is an ingredient in concrete. Just an ingredient, like eggs in a cake. Don’t mess it up. Let’s try and pretend we’ve grown since Chris’s casual ignorance.
2. It’s like the wisest thing ever. Wise, you ask? Yes, wise. I truly believe you ripen in wisdom with age, like wine, or your grandmother. Twelve million years ago concrete appeared naturally. Pretty sweet if you ask me. Concrete, I swear you don’t look a day over two million.
3. It’s kind of crazy durable. You know that place people refer to as Rome? It’s a pretty big deal. If you know what I’m talking about, think about this particular structure: The Colosseum. The Romans finished construction on that bad boy around 80 AD using our wonderful friend, concrete. It’s. Still. Standing.
4. There are people that love concrete that you wouldn’t expect. First: The Egyptians. All those giant triangle looking things? They were built with a kind of concrete. Pyramids just became way cooler. Secondly: My boy, Tommy Edison, was all about concrete. He was so about it he held FORTY-NINE patents on it.
5. It’s super popular. It’s beyond that of the Prom Queen of high school. Think about those times you go out to lunch with your friend, Suzy, (the name is hypothetical, work with me), and between almost every bite of your overpriced salad, you are interrupted. By who? The many people Suzy knows. There is a chance that she may know the entire world. When the fifth person comes over to say hi, and you are feeling lonely, depressed and reminded of your apparent lack of numerous friendships, you should think of concrete. Suzy and concrete are probably best friends. Concrete is everywhere, it knows everyone. It is the most used man-made material on the planet. Yeah, I know. You secretly resent Suzy and her BFF Concrete. Me too. This may be because I spend all my time writing blogs, and well, you’re reading them.
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